Our Difficulty in Love is related to an “Excess” of “Psychology”:

Eva Illouz is a Professor of Sociology at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem and the School for Advanced Studies in the Social Sciences in Paris. She wrote a book related to Love and what is not working in our Current Society.

(“Why Love Hurts”: A Sociological Explanation) (“Pourquoi l’amour fait mal”), Eva Illouz (Seuil). Polity Press. March 2012. 300 pages. Is a book de-constructing the “Love Ideology and Pattern” (Link)

Eva Illouz explain us in her book “Our Difficulty in Love is related to an Excess of Psychology.“

She explain basically in one sentence everything

We will try to here to explain how to act on Stress but also explaining Psychology aspect that can help following some Psychiatrist advices

When we are stress there is aspect one is Mental stress one is Physical stress, but in any case, Problem is when the stress increase there is not so much things we can do whereas taking care about ourself.

Stress in Love generally is quite similar to a depression (Link). Saying to someone we are not fine is difficult it’s something cannot be explain so much in word.

We have to remember to take care about ourself as the most important step, to expect to take care or be fine with others.

You can compare Stress as Mindfulness Teacher Mention for Depression as our Mindset similar to a Glass Full of Water and Dust on the Bottom. When we check the Glass the Water get cloudy.

There is not so much things to do whereas “Have a rest”. something you can do and quite helpfull is to go to library and find book related to Health and Wellbeing.

What can we do
Physically ?

Regarding the Physical aspect you can generally find it’s sign about something missing in our : Nutrition (Link) (Link), Hydration (Link) (Link) (Link), and / or Good Sleep (Link).

Anita Bean : “Hydration level and Fluid Loss”

( Anita Bean – “The Complete Guide to Sports Nutrition” – https://anitabean.co.uk/my-books/ )

It’s very complex but Stress Dehydration and Hallucination are generally connected. Stress increase more and more when we are becoming “Dehydrated.” As we can see on the Anita Schema. Keeping hydration “As much” as we can is important and helpful as much as Eating or Sleeping.

An other information to reduce stress can be find on the following document

British Heart Foundation : “Understanding Stress”

As we can read : “Once you know what’s making you stressed, you can start tackling it in a few different ways, this will stop making choices that increase your risk of heart and circulatory diseases :

• “Try no to Binge Drink – That’s more than 6 Units in a single session for men, and 6 units for women.”

• “Drink plenty of water. Staying hydrated will help you feel less Irritable.”

Remember as we says sometimes If you feel thirsty it’s already Long time you are Dehydrated.

All is affecting our Health and Lifestyle that can impact our relationship around us with our loved one. By reducing stress it help to protect ourself and other.

Of course relationship are exposed to life and Event there is always ups and down in every relationship because it’s something alive there is also some tips and trick to find a way to protect your loved one, It’s probably idealistic but can help in some way.

What can we do
Mentally ?

Protecting our “Unique” loved one:

In France during a Political TV show name “Riposte” a Lady Guest was Interviewed in the begining of the show by “Serge Moati“.

The Lady explain “Her vision” about partnership and love :

She basically explain : In Relationship between Men and “Ladies“. The ladies globally preferred to stay “The unique loved one“, she explain it is better to not keep anything, from past or previous Love relationship and better to “Delete”, “Trash” or even “Burn” everything as (Object, Pictures..) .

She explain that “It is very painful for current partner to find suddenly old Souvenir, Pictures, Objects, Anything that can be related to past, previous relationship.“

(Note from HealthInYourPlanet Website : The lady talked only about “Ladies” during interview but it might be also the same for “Men“) (When the Lady mention about Burning old souvenir the “Burning symbol” was used but trashing everything to the “Garbage Collection Center” also work very well do not add fire to your house for burning something you don’t want any-more )

Protecting our “love”/”couple” with a “Totem Idea”:

Psychiatrist explain sometimes when a couple have to rebuild or keep their love. A possibility for them is to create a sort of “Totem” for the couple, themselves, having something to be able to represent and symbolise their Love.

As previously mention Finding old souvenir from Past Relationship is the “Exact Counter Act” of love, this is the reason why we recommend to remove souvenir, old pictures, from past relationship.

French Singer named “Vanessa Paradis” in her song “Pourtant“. Mention also “J’ai incendier la boite mon coeur” we can translate it in English as “I have burn the “Heart” Box“. Meaning possibly destroying old souvenir from Past / Previous relationship.

A singer from the group named “Zoufris Maracas” in the song “Un Gamin” explain “There is no love without exclusivity” which is an Ideal and explain the complexity and difficulty, behind relationship we are all building during our life.

Even if we have difficulty to separate ourself from old “Souvenir“. Removing everything is always the best to avoid issues. Sometimes it’s difficult, We might have doubt about it, but, then after realising it was the best to do in any case.

Social Context
(Family and Friends)
What can we do?

Friendship and Relationship “Souvenir”:

When sometimes we feel we want to liberate ourself from old souvenir, the risk is we might get too quick to trash “Everything” and regret it later on.

The best is to take distance with what we want to do, then try to “Sort” everything by “Separating things” between “Love Relationship” and “Simple Friendship Souvenir“. Only yourself can really know the limit between old Friendship and previous Love Relationship.

French Rapper named “Disiz La Peste” explain in his song :

• “The past as a “Small Museum”, I’m walking on it to keep myself fine, I keep them, I keep them, I keep them, my souvenir become pages on paintings“.

(French original version) : “Le passe comme un petit musee, je m’y promene pour me faire du bien, je les guardes, je les guardes, je les guardes, mes souvenirs sont des pages sur les toiles”.

Keeping old Family, Friends Pictures and Keep looking at them sometime to time help to entertain our memory without even noticing it.
It permit to Keep relationship more warm… maybe sometimes too much, but it help to keep our old Friends and Family around us. Keeping our past history is a choice. We say sometimes we build ourself from “The others”, it can be anyone, Family, Friends they are all also a part of ourself.

To find more information regarding, “How is working our Memory?” And “How to entertain it ?” please go on the (Link)